College Life Hacks
Some great basic tips to make your college experience so much better.
1. Have too many dirty dishes to clean? Just throw ‘em out!
Stacked dirty dishes. Image credit: Unsplash/Scott Umstattd
We have friends to see. We have meetings. We have classes. We have events. We have work. Sometimes we’re in a rush after we eat and can’t clean our dishes right away. Which is fine. But after a while, those dishes turn into a little stack, and then a mountain, and then a balancing act, and we have to know when to stop.
The day has finally come for you to grab that sponge and put in some work, but that precarious mountain of dishes is daunting, to say the least. Not to fear, though, because there is a solution to this problem that cuts the cleaning time in half. First, you’ll want to get a trash bag. These can be found in 99.9% of the grocery stores in town. Next, open the trash bag. Now, you’ll need a Cleaning Buddy for this next step, preferably your roommate who has also been adding to the pile. As you hold the trash bag open next to the counter, have your designated Cleaning Buddy swipe all the dishes into the trash bag. Once all your dishes are gone, close the bag and bring it to the designated trash can. (Note: you will need to buy new dishes.)
2. Do all your chores on Sundays to compensate for procrastinating on homework!
Vacuuming your house and cleaning your white shoes. Image credit: Unsplash/ The Creative Exchange.
It's Sunday. You’re sitting at your computer, staring at a blank screen. It’s been an hour and this essay is due tomorrow and you’ve got nothing. But… don't the dishes need throwing out? You should do that now. Also, the floor hasn’t been vacuumed in a while, and you’re running out of clean underwear so you should probably head over to the laundromat as well. You should probably shower too; all this cleaning has gotten you sweaty and tired, a shower should make you feel good. And just to make sure your space is ready for productivity and good vibes, saging one’s room has been proven to eliminate bad energy and leave one feeling fresh and ready to achieve any goal they set for themselves—like writing an entire essay at three AM when it’s due in six hours (in their squeaky-clean room). Now that’s an outstanding student.
3. Study for your exam, then skip it to reward yourself for studying!
Studying for finals. Image credit: Unsplash/Jonny McLaren.
You’ve been studying nonstop this past week for your exam. You’ve gone to your prof’s office hours and you even went to your classmate’s study session. You have a good feeling about the test and you’re finally feeling like you understand what’s going on during class. But all the stress of the incoming exam is too much for you to handle. So, what can you do to lighten your load? Easy! Snooze that seven AM alarm and give yourself the day off. You deserve this break after all your hard work! Sleep through the whole day if you want. And to make sure you get the rest you need, the best thing to do is to turn off your phone. Now, all those incoming texts from classmates asking where you are won’t wake you and disrupt your slumber.
4. Got the flu and it’s making you feel homesick? Just listen to the saddest songs you know and play the 'Don’t Cry' game with yourself!
Sick in your Comforts of Home-Ikea bed. Image credit: Unsplash/Elizabeth Lies.
Nobody likes having the flu, but having it thousands of miles away from your mom’s chicken noodle soup and your comfy, familiar bed? A million times worse. And obviously, because it is Paris, it is pouring rain outside. What can you do that will guarantee a better mood? When you get a free second away from the toilet bowl, grab your phone. Next, put on every single sad song you know and play a fun game called 'Don’t Cry'. It works every time. Among those sad songs, make sure to include childhood lullabies, your parents’ favorite jams, songs you’ve played on road trips with family and/or friends, and anything else that brings back heartbreakingly beautiful memories. The game will get more challenging, but that’s what makes it so fun. The second you’ve become a stone-cold, emotionless black hole that’s impervious to pain, you’ll know you’ve won! You’ll still be vomiting, though.
5. Go clubbing before your early morning transatlantic flight.
Early morning at the airport. Unsplash/ Philipp Dubach.
It's almost time to go back home and see your parents and siblings. Yet you're probably more excited to see your dog. To celebrate the end of the semester you and your friends decide to go out clubbing. It's a great way to stay up all night and pass out during your flight. You go clubbing around midnight and get completely trashed for the next five hours. Then stumble your way to your Uber that will take you home. In your intoxicated state, you fumble your two giant suitcases out of your small Parisian apartment - its better to overpack than to not pack enough for your two weeks at home. If the elevator is too slow, just drag them down the stairs, I'm sure your neighbors won't mind. Order yourself another over-priced Uber to Charles-de-Gaulle Airport and start to sober-up right as you go through security. No one will have noticed a thing and you'll be horribly hungover on your eight-hour flight.
