Back in the USA: Reverse Culture Shock is Real
When I first stepped off the plane in Texas after living in China for close to two years, I knew I would need more than tequila shots and tacos to rehabilitate myself back into the red, white, and blue.
The airport alone was more than alarming. Why was everyone wearing sweat pants, baseball hats, and leggings? The vast amount of personal space around me was comforting, yet still confusing. And the amount of English blaring through intercom systems was definitely annoying.
Unlike most of my peers, I actually was not looking forward to coming home and, if I'd had my way, I would still be in the Middle Kingdom eating street dumplings curbside with a beer at two o'clock in the morning. But after a series of unfortunate events, and the slight recession that hit some of us in China, I was out of a job and had no choice but to find my way home. I knew it was going to be hard once I landed back in Texas, but damn I hadn't even left the airport yet.
Image Credit: Tumblr @setonfireinasilverdream
The first few days weren't awful. I actually found myself pretty happy back in my fluffy queen-size bed, being able to take an actual shower in an actual bath tub, and being smothered with puppy kisses.
I was enjoying all the material joys of America and was absolutely thrilled to tell everyone about crazy China and the adventures that came with it. Only problem was, no one really cared. I mean, yeah, friends from college asked me what was the weirdest thing I ate, and my parents asked me what I liked best about my job. But my God, how do you explain to Americans the importance of saving face without rambling on for five hours?
For nearly two years, all I'd thought, breathed, and lived was China, and here I was in godforsaken Cowboy Country. I didn't want to admit it, but I was in the Gullahorn's crisis stage of reverse culture shock.
Image Credit: State.gov
Fast-forward to almost a year later. Today I find myself in an almost identical situation. After spending one semester pursuing a Masters degree in Paris, I've decided to come home for the holidays. This time, the red flags look a little different than last time and I've been able to nail them down a little easier.
If you're a two-time expat like me, the good news is it's easier the second time. If it's your first time, you'll probably find that this list of flags and tips resonates more than your surroundings back home.
You've Lost Your Words
One of my hardest challenges in almost any setting is trying to not speak Chinese or French to anglophones. You would think that coming back to your motherland would make things a lot easier but, as life would have it, it's most definitely au contraire. Your ears have happily been processing exotic syllables that you've convinced yourself are way better than your own, and now that you've been forced to stop foreign language repetition, it's driving you absolutely mad.
You realize that waiting an extra five seconds to respond to just about anything so you don't sound completely tongue-tied and English is just plain boring. Unfortunately, patience is going to require a lot of you. Give yourself time to want to communicate with others and, if necessary, find people who speak the same language(s) so you can hold on to a piece of your expat life.
Image Credit: Seventeen.com
Dining Etiquette
If you're coming from a country that values quiet, intimate dinners, you probably didn't realize it until you went back to the states. All of a sudden everyone seems so loud and ill-mannered. The waiter can't leave you alone for more than five minutes, and even had the audacity to ask to see your ID. The obvious solution to this is one you've probably already mastered. Get yourself a good home-cooked meal or favorite local take out-and eat it shamelessly with as much wine as possible. My mom's guacamole was, and still, is my best coping mechanism.
Image Credit: Giphy.com
F**ked Up Political Talk
If you're like me, then one big reason for leaving the states was because of the horrible political climate. When you're across oceans, it's much easier to point and laugh from afar and pretend like you're neither part of the problem nor the solution.
Coming back at the end of 2016, however, can be scary. Seeing life-size poster board figures of Donald Trump and Hillary Clinton at airport arrivals can be a little jarring for some of us (and what the hell Texas? I just got here!). Regardless, we're going to have to tackle this head-on, and if you plan on joining political debates at bars the only advice I have for you is don't. You don't need that kind of negativity in your life.
Image Credit: Giphy.com
Everyone is Weird
When I first returned from China I heard some of my friends' southern accents that I never picked up on before. Coming back from Paris, I now realize how awfully dressed Americans can be. Regardless of your departure location, you're bound to notice some bizarre things you never noticed before, and they usually confirm why you left in the first place. Instead of becoming a pompous well-traveled asshole, and telling your hometown victims of the horrors they perpetrate, make a mental note of it and discuss the hilarity with your fellow expats who will truly understand.
Everyone Thinks You're Weird
Now that you've seen the world, chances are that making those stories relatable to friends back home is going to be really hard. No matter how many times you tell that story of how you and your friends got wasted by the Eiffel Tower, it's never going to feel like you actually got your point across.
Living abroad in its entirety is one giant you-had-to-be-there inside joke and that's okay. Share the good stories when the time is right, and don't forget to listen to you hometown friends' stories too. Their life has been going on too, you know.
Image Credit: Hercampus.com
You Left a Piece of You in Your Host Country
The truth about reverse culture shock is that the actual shock stems from a realization that not only have you changed, but so has your home country. Everyone looks and feels different, because, well, they are. As you've been traveling the world and building a life abroad, the rest of the world has been moving right along too.
It's a hard realization, especially once you discover that there's still a piece of you in your host country who feels like you just abandoned them. When you finally decide to accept that your time abroad made you into a drastically different person, then adjustment can finally happen. And if you do decide that maybe you've changed a little too much, then opt out of the adjustment stage all together and become an expat for life like the rest of us.
That way, this sort of thing doesn't ever need to happen again.
Image Credit: Giphy.com
