Apr 18th, 2017, 01:14 AM

The Twelve Tribes of AUP

By Sabrina Aguirre
Image Credit: Shutterstock
Different character types that every AUP student will recognize. One of them might be you.

1. The Partiers

We all know these people. You can find them at a club sending out shaky Snapchats of themselves, holding a glass of alcohol while dancing to a Drake song. It doesn't matter if it's a Monday night or the weekend evening, they’ll find a place to party — and, probably, get wasted. And yet, the next day you’ll find them in class — though they avoid signing up for early 9 am classes. At that hour, they are usually downing their last shot of liquor.

2. The Underachievers

At least 20 minutes late to every class, never finishing assignments, then dropping the course. I mean really, you guys go to AUP, how hard can it be?

3. The Radical Activists

They've marched at every protest. They're anti-Trump, anti-men, anti-everything. They're most likely feminists who repost more "inspirational" BuzzFeed videos than should be allowed.

4.The Human ATM's

They pay for the UBER. They pay for the entire the table. I mean, they might as well start paying for your education. As someone once said, these guys might not be the life of party, but they are definitely the ones funding it.

5. The Trojan Transfers (USC Kids)

Probably sporting some type of USC sportswear, these guys are only at AUP as their plan B. But let's get real, they have nothing to do with either Trojans, if you know what I mean…

Image credit: Shutterstock/Disobey Art 

6. The Hippies

They only drink organic water, only use organic pens, and only have organic paper because they love Mother Earth. The likelihood of one of them being VEGAN is, of course, very very high. If they are, they will let you know, don't worry.

7. The Materialistic Ones

These students make the classrooms look like Paris Fashion Week runways. Gucci purse, Hermès belt, Moschino dress. Yes, very nice, but you do realize this is just school, right?

8. The Stoners

If you haven't identified yourself with any of the tribes described so far, do not worry, here is your chance. I mean it’s a fact that 99.9% of AUP students do marijuana so…

9. The Overachievers

Stop stressing over your 98.5% on the French quiz. In class, you may hear something like this from them: "Sir, you forgot about the homework you assigned us last week.“ We get it, you didn’t get into your top choice university, but this is AUP, we are all here just trying for solid B's, so chill.

10. The Jocks

Just kidding, lol, we go to AUP, we don't do sports.

11. The Ones Always in the AMEX

Do you guys even ever go to class? All you ever seem to do is down 5-euro pints and smoke.

12. The Ones Who Are Actually French

Guys, honestly, what are you even doing at AUP?